Tuesday, February 01, 2005

Congratulations, y'all

Did I tell you I'm going to Texas? CJD (they really are his initials - I'm not suggesting he's a mad cow) is getting married. I thought long and hard about whether to go or not. It's a helluva long way. And a bloody expensive time of year to travel (Easter weekend). But at the end of the day, he's one of my closest friends. And I'm not sure I'll be 100% convinced that he's actually married unless I witness it with my own eyes.

So I've booked the tickets - economy class. I'm beginning to think it might be a mistake to travel for 10 hours non-stop three-passengers-abreast in an upright position. It's just asking for DVT. I think I might turn up at check-in early, dressed to the nines and try to wangle an upgrade. Apparently they offer most of the upgrades to female passengers traveling alone. And there has to be some advantage to being a single female, doesn't there?

It'll be a fleeting visit. Travel out on Friday and return on Monday on the night flight. But my God they cram in a lot in between. Friday night dinner, Shabbat morning service (at which I'm leyning - talk about a busmans holiday!), Rehearsal dinner on Saturday night and then the wedding itself on Sunday. There won't be time to visit the Ewing ranch or [insert place in Texas worth visiting - I can't think of any]. I'll be too busy eating roast chicken and toasting the "happy couple" (why do people insist on calling the bride and groom "the happy couple"?) to do any sight seeing.

And if all that is not scary enough, I've been asked to emcee the rehearsal dinner. That's emcee - not MC - I'm not really the "BIG IT UP" type. The rehearsal dinner is a new phenomenon to me. Apparently they're very common in the States. It's not a rehearsal at all. It's a full on dinner with a band and dancing and the emcee has to introduce a series of songs/poems/sketches all in honour of the happy couple. And each little introduction has to be funny. The problem is that the audience will be a mixture of Americans and Brits. It's very hard to make both groups laugh because we each put very different things in our comedy. For example, we Brits tend to put humour in ours. But I'm sure I'll find something to say. And it's an honour to be asked to participate in their big day. So, if they're listening, congratulations (or, as my Mum would say, a hearty mazaltov) to CJD and FM on your impending wedding. I hope that you will be as happy as I thought I'd be….


Blogger bangedmyhead said...

at least your ipod should keep you busy on your 10 hour flight!

6:09 pm  
Blogger R.x said...

You're right. Though between watching the inflight movie, choosing duty free perfume, eating the meal, snapping the plastic fork, asking for a new fork, finishing the meal and going to the chemical toilet, I'm not sure there will be much time to listen to it!

11:19 pm  

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